**This post is part of the Cultivate Your Home membership community. To read the full post, please join our monthly membership for access to this and other content to support you in your motherhood, homeschool, and handmade life**
Every household is going to handle kids and chores differently, but part of teaching our kids is teaching them responsibility and life skills. We want them to leave our homes fully equipped to go out on their own. Chores are part of that, at least at our house!
Obviously you need to give your kids responsibilities according to their ability, and you need to decide how much they can handle. Since we homeschool, chores and household responsibilities are built right into our day, and are part of the life skills we are teaching our kids each day.
My kids know that no one person can keep the home running – not even super mom. There are many things that I will do for my kids, but I also think it’s important for them to share the responsibility and learn the skills for themselves.
How do kids benefit from chores?
There are many benefits to giving your kids responsibilities in the home. Besides teaching them real life skills, the most important for me is that it helps to teach our kids to have a servant heart. This quote from Kristen Welch describes it perfectly:
To raise grateful kids in an entitled world, it’s important to shift the focus off ourselves and onto others, because entitlement is always self-seeking.
Kristen Welch, Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World
The culture we live in is very me-centered, so teaching our kids to be other-centered is a Kingdom concept. When kids contribute to the household through chores, they aren’t just doing something for themselves. Yes, we teach them to clean up their own messes and to be responsible for their own spaces. But when they care for the home – doing dishes or laundry that aren’t theirs, sweeping messes they didn’t make, etc. it takes away the “I didn’t do that, so I’m not responsible for it” mentality.
I highly recommend the book Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World by Kristen Welch, especially if this is a new concept to you or if you have always been in the “let kids be kids without responsibilities” camp.
How to incorporate daily responsibilities:
There are so many ways to incorporate daily responsibilities. For us, we have just made chores a part of our regular, daily rhythm. We set these as expectations for our kids to do daily or weekly, so that it becomes a natural routine. This eliminates some of the nagging “do your chores” from me.
If your kids are young, begin this now! It helps to have these expectations set when your kids are little – that they will contribute to the home and participate in taking care of it together. I often use the phrase: “We are a family, and we all work together to make this home run!”
For us, it helps to have our kids keep one chore for a long time. This means that they don’t switch around every week. So for months, they have one main chore that’s their responsibility. This will increase as they get older, of course, and occasionally we will change the chores around or give them different responsibilities as their younger siblings get older and need their own responsibilities.
Here are some examples of my boys’ regular chores
My four older kids each have one regular kitchen chore they need to do daily. Our kitchen layout is large enough that we have one sweep the stairs and the half of the kitchen around the island, another boy will sweep around/under the kitchen table and around the entryway. Then one of our boys will empty the dishwasher, one will load. They also help set and clear the table each day for dinner, and are responsible for putting away any leftover food at the end of the meal. We have built all of these into our rhythm, so that they know to expect them. It’s not a surprise or a shock when we ask them to do their kitchen chores – they know to do these everyday (with some reminders)
Our oldest is responsible for the chicken chores each day – giving them food and water. The kids will all gather eggs, whoever opens the coop or closes it at night. My oldest two boys are responsible for cleaning out nesting boxes and refreshing bedding on a weekly-ish basis.
All the boys share responsibility in cleaning bathrooms weekly. We don’t have a particular day this happens, we usually save cleaning for right before someone comes over. ;)
My youngest is in charge of vacuuming the stairs and hallway. He puts away kitchen towels, rags, and cloth napkins, and he also helps set the table for dinner. He is learning to sweep so that he can take over that, when his older brother moves on to a different chore.
They are responsible each day for picking up common spaces. We do a big clean up once a week of common spaces to keep them from getting really messy. This tends to happen before someone comes over too.. ha!
My boys also make their own breakfast and lunches (my youngest does this with help), and they help with meal prep. My oldest two boys are in charge of dinner about once a week.
Our boys have other chores that come up semi-regularly, like vacuuming common spaces or mowing the lawn, but those don’t have a regular schedule.
Read this post to give you some practical ideas for encouraging responsibility and life skills in the kitchen.
Age appropriate responsibilities
These are just some examples of age appropriate household chores. You know your child best and what they are capable of doing. What you have your kids do in your home will depend on your rhythms and routines. If you have a farm or homestead, your kids may have completely different responsibilities! My older boys have a lot of chicken responsibilities, so I don’t expect them to do the laundry.
If you feel like you’re constantly nagging your kids to clean up, do their chores, or pick up their toys, a chore chart may be helpful for your home! I made this one to use with my kids, to shift the personal responsibility from ME telling them to do it, to THEM being in charge.
Should you pay for chores?
This is definitely a personal choice. We have chosen not to pay for regular, everyday chores. We expect our kids to contribute to our family, so we don’t give an allowance for these everyday chores. We do pay for extra chores, especially ones that take an extra long time or extra effort, like mowing or cleaning out the garage or car. If a child takes the initiative to do a big cleaning project (maybe they clean the playroom or help a sibling clean their bedroom) we will reward that with payment or a special thank you like a fun treat.
My kids tend to offer to clean up in exchange for Minecraft time. This is something my kids initiated on their own, and since we don’t do a lot of screen time, I’m happy to reward cleaning with game time.
Download the chore chart below to use in your home with your kids:
You can use these printables in many different ways, but I recommend laminating, so your child can check off their completed tasks daily with a dry erase marker.
The chore cards can be printed on cardstock or also laminated. If you choose to laminate, you can write your child’s name on the card or write specifics about the chore (a day, a specific room, etc.). The pictures will help children who don’t read to know which chore they are supposed to do.
Try using the cards like a game – put the cards into a cup and have your child pick which chore to do that day!