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In the day-to-day of parenting, we have so much to think about: meals to cook, phone calls to make, dishes to wash, laundry to do, homeschooling, sports practice, dentist appointments, supplements to give, bedtime routines… the list goes on and on, right? There are a lot of things that we think about and manage.
In the middle of all of these tasks and everyday moments, our kids misbehave, push the boundaries, and test our patience. So while we are correcting behaviors and setting boundaries, we can sometimes forget to be intentional about encouraging our kids. But our kids need us to be their biggest encourager, their cheerleader, their support, and the one who lifts them up. And sometimes, they need it the most when they are the most challenging.
Let’s encourage them when they:
- take initiative to do a job around the house without being asked
- work hard at a task
- listen well and act obediently
- take responsibility in an area they have struggled in the past
- try something new
- apologize without being reminded
- come forward and admit when they have made a mistake
- choose not to hurt a sibling
- give back something that belongs to someone else
- make progress in an academic area that’s challenging
- do their daily chores without reminding
- clean up without being asked
- persevere through a challenging task
- give someone a gift for no reason
- compliment a sibling
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
We can say things like:
- I appreciate when you…
- You worked so hard at…
- Thank you for helping with…
- I noticed when you…
- I’m so thankful that you…
- I really see a difference in…
- You were so kind when you…
- You really showed initiative when you…
- I’m so proud of you for…
When we go out of our way to point out their good decisions and positive behaviors, it encourages them to continue to make more good decisions. When we shift our focus off of their poor choices, and onto the good ones, it encourages them to grow in godly character.
Don’t forget to bring all of these challenging, patience-testing behaviors to the Lord in prayer. Give them over to Him, and ask Him to give you wisdom to know how and when to encourage your kids. When to encourage and when to correct – or how to do both together. He loves you and wants you to parent your kids well! He has everything you need to be the mom your kids need. When we feel like we’re not enough, He is enough. He can give us the strength, patience, and grace to walk through the hardest of parenting situations.